A Pre-Climb Climb

Yesterday, I went on my pre-climb climb on Mount Kilimanjaro, motivated by Cory's advice that by doing an "acclimatization climb" I could double my chances of successfully climbing Kilimanjaro.  You may know that Cory has diligently avoided all understanding of things mathematical.  (Motivated, I suspect by having once read the following statement by Thomas Mann: “I tell them that if they will occupy themselves with the study of mathematics they will find in it the best remedy against the lusts of the flesh.”)

Despite his numerical illiteracy, Cory's advice is undoubtedly accurate this time.  I had calculated my chances of success, prior to the pre-climb climb at roughly 0%.  But now, thanks to my efforts yesterday, I can safely say that my newly calculated chances of success have improved to 0%.  My only hope of defying these odds is if the words of Augustine of Hippo prove to be true:

“The good Christian should beware of mathematicians.  The danger already exists that mathematicians have made a covenant with the devil to darken the spirit and confine man in the bonds of Hell.”  

By the way, this quote, and the 36 years I have know Cory, are the first things that make me seriously consider the possibility of reincarnation.

 












(The similarities are uncanny!)

As a mathematician, although I have not consciously made a covenant with the devil, I have certainly engaged in powerful and sustained efforts to darken the spirits of my students and to confine them in mathematical hell.  So, Devil, if you're reading this--you owe me one!  I expect your help up the mountain.

The one-day climb on Kilimanjaro allowed me to get up to around 11,000 feet of altitude, which is normally 1 1/2 days of climbing for people taking that route to the top of the mountain.  (I was on the Marangu Route--also know as the "Coca-Cola Route".  The route that Cory and I will be taking is the Umbwe Route, so I was not able to familiarize myself with our route but I was able to test out my legs and lungs.)

I am please to report that I had not just a great climb, but a stupendous climb.  A "great climb" being one in which I do not break any weight-bearing bones, and a "stupendous climb" being one in which I do not fall down.  I hope to achieve another great climb with Cory, but have no illusions that it can be a stupendous climb, seeing as how I cannot walk around my house for 6 days without falling down.

 As you can see from the following pictures, there is remarkable variation in the plant life as you gain altitude on the mountain.

The middle two pictures were taken from the same spot on the trail.  The first shows the damage from a 2008 wildfire, while the second shows an area that was not burned by the fire.

I wasn't expecting the surroundings to be so interesting, though I expect it gets barren and dull higher up.  Nonetheless, I will take many, many pictures--the better to annoy my friends with.  (Here that, Devil?  I'm like your second self!)

46664

I find myself reflecting on choices, values and morality these days.  Which may be particularly timely, as we appear to be about to say a final goodbye to a man that seems to have provided us with a remarkable example of the best of humankind.

In contrast to Prisoner 46664, the common goal of the people I see around me currently is to maximize pleasure while minimizing effort.  And these are people who are ostensibly motivated by altruism and concern for others, in that these people are in Tanzania under the auspices of volunteer organizations.  If I sound irritated, it is because I am--which makes me remember what Thomas Macaulay said about puritans:  "The puritan hated bear baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators."

 

(You probably can't read the sign on this sinner, but it says "A Wanton Gospeller."  And, while I'm not quite sure what you must do to be called a wanton gospeller, I am 100% certain that I have done worse.)

So here's a question for you.  Immanuel Kant wrote that "We are not rich by what we possess, but by what we can do without."  How the hell did he avoid being locked up in the nut house?  And, since I agree with this lunatic on this subject, why am I not on a court-ordered psychotropic drug regimen?  Or was a secret treatment employed whereby I was given a post-hypnotic suggestion that I wanted to try every beer in Tanzania?  If the last option is the truth, then I would like to offer my thanks to the health care professional responsible for this innovative and effective treatment.

Here's another question for you.  Is stupidity contagious, or does one person's unselfconscious stupidity simply lift the lid off of the stupidity that people normally have sufficient self-awareness to keep covered?  Of course, I wouldn't ask the question if I hadn't already made up my mind as to the correct answer.  In this case, the answer is the second part of the question.  (Have you noticed that I am not the only one who uses questions to attempt to influence the response and not to acquire information?  I, at least, have the excuse that, in knowledgeable circles, asking questions that influence the response is known as "creative pedagogy.")

Here's yet a third question.  Suppose you were a volunteer from Australia volunteering in Tanzania and that you were taking a tourist outing to visit a "Masai Village."  (It is an actual Masai settlement, but the residents dress up, dance, etc. as a show for the tourists.)  Now tell me, would you, at the end of your 3 hour visit to the settlement, when the rest of your group has been loaded onto the bus and the Masai are wanting to head home, pull out a prepared speech and, reading from this script, declare that you have been touched by these people, that you love them all, that they will always be in your heart, and that if they are ever in Australia, they have a place to stay?  If you are conflicted about your answer to this question, then either (1) I need to sharpen my communication skills; (2) you need to rethink your entire philosophy of life; or (3) you are an actual volunteer living here in the same house as I am. 

In other words, "Please, please, please, intensify that post-hypnotic suggestion about beers."  Or come visit me and reassure me that all the good, sensible, ethical, honorable friends that I have been lucky enough to have made are not figments of malaria-medicine-induced hallucinations but are in fact real people.  Unless, of course, my three Finnish friends in the following photograph are malaria-medicine-induced hallucinations (which seems far more likely than that they are actual friends).  If the latter is true, no need to visit--just convince my doctor to double my malaria medicine dosage.

And lest you suggest that I'm a disgusting old pervert, let me point out that, when their ages are added together, these three girls are nine years older than I am.  At this point, I should also note another portion of Immanuel Kant's philosophy that I embrace--at least as these three friends are concerned--"Always treat people as ends in themselves, never as means to an end."  Right on, Manny!